Last time I wrote, I laid some groundwork for introducing the topic of money and sex, in which I shared how people having difficulty with fertility often notice they also have difficulty with “creation” in general - getting their business off the ground, making important relationship changes happen, etc.
Today I want to get more into how your money stuff and creation stuff often comes down to sexual energy, and how well your sexual energy flows… or doesn’t flow.
The same parts of the body associated with the energy of creation/fertility (the hips, lower abdomen, and reproductive area) are also the parts of the body associated with abundance, money, pleasure, connection, and sensuality. This whole physical area is sometimes called the “sexual center.” When the sexual center is open and functioning well, your flowing sexual energy - aka “chi” or life-force energy - will support your experiences around these themes. So if your relationship with money is constricted, it’s likely that you’ll notice parallel constrictions around intimacy, pleasure, sensuality, fertility, etc.
I remember a business masterminding meeting I was at once, in which a friend of mine, a money coach, told me that if I wanted to grow my business to the next level I should take a look at my sex life. “Are you feeling juicy, sexy, and satisfied?” she asked. When I told her things were feeling a little dry in that department, she said, half jokingly and half not, “Great! Easy fix. Go get some.”
Now, let me be clear, it’s simplistic to say any of this is just about sex. Having more sex isn’t the same as nourishing your sexual energy. Sexual energy - which certainly impacts the quality and pleasure of intercourse - is about much more. Sexual energy IS pure life force energy. And when it’s flowing well, you’ll feel vibrant, alive, and connected to your senses, your body, & your relationships.
So if you have money problems, which could include “not enough” money, preoccupation with money (constant thoughts/calculations running through your head), or other variations of angsty patterns, assess the health of your sexual energy.
When it comes to healthy creative, sexual energy there are 3 things I suggest looking at:
Healing old sexual wounds & traumas. 25-40% of women have experienced any number of major sexual violations. There are different levels of resolution and healing available - even if the trauma is decades old. Many women who have already processed these traumas via therapy, etc., find that holistic healing approaches help release the more subtle residue these experiences have left behind. Women are surprised by the shifts they feel from seemingly subtle healings - the impact often starts with more safety/power, but ripples out to more aliveness, more sensuality, and more ease. And that’s just for starters.
Attending to the impact of “everyday sexism” from outside (and from within). I’m now referring to those everyday traumas experienced by most women, things you may think of as “traumas with a little ‘t’” like: Sexist or demeaning media images, overt sexism at work, subtle sexism in spiritual communities… even my own field of psychology was founded upon the idea that women who were connected to their emotions in a certain way were “neurotic” and needed treatment from men (they were pathologized for wanting to express their sexuality and redistribute imbalanced societal gender roles). This category of traumas affects every woman I know. It’s important you don’t discount the impact of these daily experiences, because such traumas are held in your sexual center, and they most definitely add up over time. If your sexual energy flow is less like a river and more like a trickle, perhaps these everyday traumas need to be detoxed from your body.
Using sexual energy for health, to create change, & to enliven your day to day life. Very few of us were raised to understand what it means to be connected to our bodies, to feel positive about being a woman, or to tap into the power of emotions in the particular way only we as women can. We don’t realize how GOOD we’ll feel when this huge piece of mind/body health is in place. Instead, most of us had bewildered or tired parents who taught us – consciously or unconsciously – to “shut down” emotions, to focus on primarily cultivating our minds, and to look to media for cues on what it means to be a woman. Sex, if discussed openly at all, was presented to most women I work with in completely conflicted ways: it’s shameful/natural, it’s good/it’s unsafe, your worth comes from being able to give a man kids/don’t get pregnant… I’ll stop there. But I have found that many common cultural messages about sex are practically impossible to navigate. We have to be sexy, but not too sexy or we might be judged as sluts. We’re taught that looks are the most important thing, but beauty shouldn’t seem like an effort or we might be judged as shallow.
AHHH! No wonder our sexual energy is all tied up! And it’s no surprise, when you start to understand this wider context, why tangled sexual energy shows up as conflicted money relationships, low libido, subdued vibrancy, inaccessible sensuality… and lower fertility rates across the board. Because it’s kind of a mess!
So it’s worth your while to to invest some energy into personal healing if you have an accumulation of traumas still sitting in your body. It’ll pay for itself - very literally - and will anchor your system into that magnetic, vibrant, healthy, and creative space that supports wholeness, that truly supports a full life.
I hope this will encourage you to take action, especially if you’ve had a nagging “action step” tapping your shoulder for a while. Your body always knows what it needs. So listen to that wisdom, and take the time to heal on all levels - and know that every positive shift you make when it comes to your sexual energy, will positively impact your relationship with money, too.
Today I want to get more into how your money stuff and creation stuff often comes down to sexual energy, and how well your sexual energy flows… or doesn’t flow.
The same parts of the body associated with the energy of creation/fertility (the hips, lower abdomen, and reproductive area) are also the parts of the body associated with abundance, money, pleasure, connection, and sensuality. This whole physical area is sometimes called the “sexual center.” When the sexual center is open and functioning well, your flowing sexual energy - aka “chi” or life-force energy - will support your experiences around these themes. So if your relationship with money is constricted, it’s likely that you’ll notice parallel constrictions around intimacy, pleasure, sensuality, fertility, etc.
I remember a business masterminding meeting I was at once, in which a friend of mine, a money coach, told me that if I wanted to grow my business to the next level I should take a look at my sex life. “Are you feeling juicy, sexy, and satisfied?” she asked. When I told her things were feeling a little dry in that department, she said, half jokingly and half not, “Great! Easy fix. Go get some.”
Now, let me be clear, it’s simplistic to say any of this is just about sex. Having more sex isn’t the same as nourishing your sexual energy. Sexual energy - which certainly impacts the quality and pleasure of intercourse - is about much more. Sexual energy IS pure life force energy. And when it’s flowing well, you’ll feel vibrant, alive, and connected to your senses, your body, & your relationships.
So if you have money problems, which could include “not enough” money, preoccupation with money (constant thoughts/calculations running through your head), or other variations of angsty patterns, assess the health of your sexual energy.
When it comes to healthy creative, sexual energy there are 3 things I suggest looking at:
Healing old sexual wounds & traumas. 25-40% of women have experienced any number of major sexual violations. There are different levels of resolution and healing available - even if the trauma is decades old. Many women who have already processed these traumas via therapy, etc., find that holistic healing approaches help release the more subtle residue these experiences have left behind. Women are surprised by the shifts they feel from seemingly subtle healings - the impact often starts with more safety/power, but ripples out to more aliveness, more sensuality, and more ease. And that’s just for starters.
Attending to the impact of “everyday sexism” from outside (and from within). I’m now referring to those everyday traumas experienced by most women, things you may think of as “traumas with a little ‘t’” like: Sexist or demeaning media images, overt sexism at work, subtle sexism in spiritual communities… even my own field of psychology was founded upon the idea that women who were connected to their emotions in a certain way were “neurotic” and needed treatment from men (they were pathologized for wanting to express their sexuality and redistribute imbalanced societal gender roles). This category of traumas affects every woman I know. It’s important you don’t discount the impact of these daily experiences, because such traumas are held in your sexual center, and they most definitely add up over time. If your sexual energy flow is less like a river and more like a trickle, perhaps these everyday traumas need to be detoxed from your body.
Using sexual energy for health, to create change, & to enliven your day to day life. Very few of us were raised to understand what it means to be connected to our bodies, to feel positive about being a woman, or to tap into the power of emotions in the particular way only we as women can. We don’t realize how GOOD we’ll feel when this huge piece of mind/body health is in place. Instead, most of us had bewildered or tired parents who taught us – consciously or unconsciously – to “shut down” emotions, to focus on primarily cultivating our minds, and to look to media for cues on what it means to be a woman. Sex, if discussed openly at all, was presented to most women I work with in completely conflicted ways: it’s shameful/natural, it’s good/it’s unsafe, your worth comes from being able to give a man kids/don’t get pregnant… I’ll stop there. But I have found that many common cultural messages about sex are practically impossible to navigate. We have to be sexy, but not too sexy or we might be judged as sluts. We’re taught that looks are the most important thing, but beauty shouldn’t seem like an effort or we might be judged as shallow.
AHHH! No wonder our sexual energy is all tied up! And it’s no surprise, when you start to understand this wider context, why tangled sexual energy shows up as conflicted money relationships, low libido, subdued vibrancy, inaccessible sensuality… and lower fertility rates across the board. Because it’s kind of a mess!
So it’s worth your while to to invest some energy into personal healing if you have an accumulation of traumas still sitting in your body. It’ll pay for itself - very literally - and will anchor your system into that magnetic, vibrant, healthy, and creative space that supports wholeness, that truly supports a full life.
I hope this will encourage you to take action, especially if you’ve had a nagging “action step” tapping your shoulder for a while. Your body always knows what it needs. So listen to that wisdom, and take the time to heal on all levels - and know that every positive shift you make when it comes to your sexual energy, will positively impact your relationship with money, too.
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