How close are you to giving birth? Now think ahead a few years into the future, and imagine what it’s going to be like to teach your child how to ride a bike for the first time - without the training wheels. Or jump off the high dive. Or step foot into the kindergarten classroom. 

The same kinds of things kids need you to embody in these situations that might be a tad-bit scary for them, are the same things they need as you get close to your due-date. 

In today’s video - just 3 minutes long - I share the 3 basic messages you want to send to your baby as you think about birth. Sometimes it’s easy to get so caught up in your prep process, classes, etc. that you forget your baby has a big job to do in his or her own right. So as you communicate with you lil one, stick to these core messages, and it will do a lot for them. During the 3rd trimester (and really before, as well) babies are showing us more and more about how much is being programmed into their neurology. That’s why my clients and I talk so much about protocols for releasing any stress that’s been in the picture.

But just as an older child will often respond courageously to little boosts of encouragement, your baby will too. It’s pretty simple, really. Take a look. :)

Pregnancy loss is a touchy subject, and rightly so. 

We talk about it so little "out there" - and yet almost 80% of women (whether they know it or not) will experience at least one pregnancy loss during their lifetime. 80%!!!

But depending on your fertility goals, how much effort & intention you’ve put into getting pregnant, and a host of other factors, pregnancy loss can absolutely knock you over with grief and exhaustion.


Physical Considerations

A miscarriage takes a huge toll on your physical body. Experts recommend giving yourself a full year to recover from a miscarriage before trying again. Even if you’re older and worried about running out of time, Roy Dittman OMD of The Brighton Baby says this: “Women that rush into getting pregnant immediately after a miscarriage have a much higher chance of miscarrying a second time… Wait 12 months before trying to conceive again. One year’s worth of preconception preparation will easily “subtract” two or more years from your Biophysical Age - literally turning your biological clock backwards. By waiting, you will be more likely to become pregnant and carry your future baby to term.” He then goes on to offer his very comprehensive physical protocol for rebuilding & strengthening the body, and it is really worth checking out.



Emotional Considerations

What I see even more people rushing through after a loss other than attending to their body, is paying attention to their emotional healing. I do get all the reasons why it’s tempting to gloss over the grief. However, you do yourself and your body a disservice when when you ignore what’s just true about the heaviness of loss, because there are parts of grief that won’t go away until you deal with them consciously. You can delay the emotional healing, but that will tend to delay your fertility timeline, in the process. 

My friend and grief counselor, Karen Mehringer of www.liveapurposefullife.com offered a few ideas for supporting the healing process that I want to re-share here.  

1. Slow down, take the time out, rest – full permission for as long as it takes
2. Express the feelings of grief – shame, anger, frustration, unworthiness… the heaviness moves more easily when you let yourself go there
3. Find a support group, formal or one with friends who can "go there" with you – it's normal to want to isolate, but connecting to support can be one of the most healing things you do
4. Ask “spirit” for help – things will start to show up!
5. Write a letter to the baby
6. Create a ritual – like planting a tree
7. Create an alter
8. Meditate/pray
9. Develop a daily gratitude practice
10. Move your body - walk, yoga, swim, dance - just find something that moves you (bonus points: include nature)
11. Find a way to give back, be of service to other people
12. Communicate what you need from one day to the next – be willing to ask for support 

You’ve quite possibly found, as you’ve read this list, that you’re already doing one or two of these suggestions, which is great! I’d like to invite you to try to find one that is a little bit of a stretch for you and try it on for size for the next week or so - especially if you’re really in the throes of grief right now. Otherwise, it’s a good idea to contact healing professionals like me or Karen, if you want some support that’s more individualized - particularly important if you’re feeling pretty stuck. 


Energetic or Soul-Level Perspectives

Another thing I like to do with clients is look at the miscarriage from a totally different perspective, which often shines a light on things for them that brings with it spontaneous healing on all levels. If you’re curious about that, keep your eyes open for the calls we offer from time to time - we'll be addressing these topics in detail.